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Externalizer Personality: Signs of a Toxic Partner and How to Deal with Toxic Relationships

Ah, The Externalizer – a fascinating specimen in the complex ecosystem of human personalities. 

The externalizer personality often seems confident at first but quickly reveals toxic dynamics. Recognizing the signs of a toxic partner is key to knowing how to deal with toxic relationships before lasting harm occurs.

I grew up in a crazy Externalizer family – filled with toxic patriarchs, drunk matriarchs, toxic feminists, toxic new-agers, toxic Catholics, demanding martyrs, and drug-selling and drug-addicted lunatics, rapists, and abandoners. 

Everybody around me was completely broken or deeply confused – borderline, bipolar, and abusive. They project their inner insanity onto each other and I absorbed their pain. I had no choice but to become a healer.

 It was a wild circus of narcissistic abuse. 

Ahh, but how I learned from this wacky bunch!

Externalizer Personality Explained

Externalization is a coping strategy where individuals attribute their emotions, failures, or challenges to external factors rather than looking inward. It’s a defense mechanism, a way to shield oneself from negative emotions by projecting them outward through abusive, controlling, or dramatic behavior. 

This can manifest as blaming others for personal setbacks, avoiding introspection, or seeking validation solely from external sources. It also results in a great deal of drama because whatever the Externalizer is feeling eventually makes its way into their reality – thereby impacting everyone and everything around them.

Externalization involves more than just the redirection of blame and control from oneself to the external world. It represents a multifaceted coping mechanism that individuals employ to navigate the turbulent waters of negative emotions and personal accountability. 

At its core, externalization is about attributing one’s emotions, failures, or challenges to factors outside oneself, thereby avoiding the often uncomfortable process of introspection. 

This defense mechanism serves as a shield, protecting the individual from the direct confrontation with personal shortcomings or painful emotions. However, the implications of externalization extend beyond personal deflection, touching upon aspects of control and the influence one might exert over their social environment.

Externalizer Personality and the Tendency to Control

Individuals who heavily rely on externalization may also exhibit tendencies to control or manipulate situations and people around them. By refusing to accept personal responsibility, they often seek to direct the narrative of their lives by influencing how others perceive and react to various circumstances. 

This need for control can manifest in an insistence on enrolling others into their perspective, convincing them to adopt a similar stance toward external factors as the source of their dilemmas. This behavior not only distances them from personal growth but also has the potential to strain relationships and create conflict within their social circles.

Signs of a Toxic Partner: Drama and Ideological Manipulation

The controlling nature of externalization becomes particularly evident when individuals attempt to enroll others in their drama or ideology. This enrollment is not merely about seeking validation for their viewpoints but also about creating a collective externalization where the responsibility is diffused among many, rather than being shouldered by the individual. 

Such dynamics can lead to toxic relationships and environments, where the underlying issues remain unaddressed, and the focus is continually shifted away from personal accountability. The drama becomes a shared narrative, detracting from the ability of each participant to recognize their own role in the situation or to pursue personal growth.

Externalizer Personality and Its Influence on Relationships

The impact of externalization on relationships cannot be overstated. It introduces a layer of complexity where not only is the individual shielded from their emotions, but they also actively seek to control the emotional landscape of their relationships. 

This can lead to a breakdown in communication and understanding, as the focus is on external blame rather than on mutual support and growth. Relationships become battlegrounds for ideologies and blame, rather than safe havens for emotional connection and personal development.

How to Deal with Toxic Relationships and Externalizer Challenges

Understanding and addressing the controlling aspects of externalization requires a nuanced approach. It involves recognizing the patterns of behavior that lead to externalization, both in oneself and in others, and gently steering the narrative towards personal responsibility and introspection. This does not mean dismissing the external factors that can indeed influence one’s life but rather balancing this recognition with an awareness of personal agency and emotional responsibility. 

Encouraging this balance is essential for fostering healthier relationships and promoting an environment where personal growth and accountability are valued.

While externalization serves as a defense mechanism to protect against negative emotions, its ramifications, particularly in terms of control and influence, underscore the need for a deeper understanding and proactive management of this tendency. 

By confronting and navigating these aspects, individuals can embark on a path toward more meaningful and fulfilling interactions, characterized by mutual respect, understanding, and personal growth.

Externalizer Personality: Unraveling the Impact

While externalization is a common aspect of human psychology, an overreliance on this defense mechanism can hinder personal growth and strain relationships. Recognizing these tendencies in ourselves or others is the first step toward fostering healthier interactions and developing a more resilient sense of self.

Externalization, a defense mechanism rooted deeply in the fabric of human psychology, plays a significant role in how individuals process emotions, setbacks, and challenges. While it’s a common strategy for coping with the complexities of life, an overdependence on externalizing personal issues can have profound implications, both for personal development and the health of interpersonal relationships. 

Understanding the intricate dynamics of externalization, its effects, and the steps toward mitigating its more negative impacts offers a pathway to richer, more constructive interactions and a stronger, more resilient self-identity.

Externalizer Personality as a Double-Edged Sword

At its core, externalization involves attributing internal distresses and failures to external circumstances or others. This mechanism, while serving as an immediate emotional salve, often leads to a stagnation in personal growth. When individuals consistently externalize, they deny themselves the opportunity for introspection—a critical process for learning, adapting, and evolving. This refusal to acknowledge personal responsibility not only hampers self-improvement but can also sow the seeds of discontent and misunderstanding in relationships.

Recognizing the Tendencies

The journey toward mitigating the impact of externalization begins with recognition. Acknowledging the presence of these tendencies, whether within oneself or observed in others, is a crucial first step. 

This awareness creates a foundation for change, enabling individuals to see how externalization might be influencing their perception of events, their reactions to challenges, and their interactions with others. It’s about developing a keen eye for those moments when the blame is shifted outward and asking the pivotal question: “Is there something within myself that I need to address?”

How to Deal with Toxic Relationships by Fostering Healthier Interactions

With recognition comes the opportunity to foster healthier interactions, both with oneself and with others. This involves cultivating a balanced perspective that acknowledges the role of external factors while also taking stock of personal responsibility.

 It’s about moving from a mindset of blame to one of empowerment, where challenges are seen as opportunities for growth rather than obstacles imposed by the outside world. In relationships, this shift can lead to more open and honest communication, where issues are addressed constructively, and each person’s role in conflicts is acknowledged and understood.

Developing a More Resilient Self

The benefits of moving beyond excessive externalization extend into the realm of personal resilience. As individuals learn to face and process their emotions internally, they build a stronger, more adaptable self. This resilience is not about ignoring the impact of external circumstances but rather integrating those experiences into a more comprehensive understanding of oneself.

It involves recognizing one’s strengths and weaknesses, learning from both successes and failures, and developing a sense of self that is grounded in reality but not defined by external validation.

Signs of a Partner: Relationship Drama

The tendency to externalize—that is, to attribute one’s internal struggles, emotions, and failings to external factors—is a behavior observed across various groups, each with its own unique set of motivations and underlying factors. 

This inclination can be particularly pronounced in individuals who are deeply religious, exhibit martyr-like behaviors, engage in substance use, have borderline personality traits, or frequently consume alcohol to excess. 

The reasons for their externalization and the subsequent impact on their social circles are both complex and multifaceted, reflecting a blend of psychological, social, and existential influences.

Externalizer Personality in Religious or Martyr-Like Behaviors

For deeply religious individuals and those who adopt martyr-like stances, externalization often stems from a profound sense of duty or a deeply held belief in a higher moral or spiritual calling. This perspective may lead them to perceive personal struggles as tests of faith or virtue, attributing trials and tribulations to divine will rather than personal choices or circumstances. 

The drive to impress their convictions upon others can arise from an earnest desire to share what they perceive as salvific truths, but it can also manifest as a form of externalizing their own inner conflicts. By focusing on converting or saving others, they may inadvertently deflect from addressing their own vulnerabilities or needs.

Externalizer Personality in Substance Use and Personality Traits

For those engaging in substance use or exhibiting borderline personality traits, externalization can serve as a coping mechanism for managing deep-seated pain, trauma, or instability. Substance use, for instance, might initially offer an escape from internal turmoil, but over time, it can lead to a cycle of dependency where the substance becomes the blamed external factor for one’s hardships. 

Similarly, individuals with borderline personality disorder (BPD) may experience intense emotions and fears of abandonment, which can result in a pattern of externalizing blame as a way to cope with these overwhelming feelings. The aggression or dramatic behavior often associated with both groups can be a means of communicating distress or attempting to feel control in a world perceived as hostile or indifferent.

Externalizer Personality, Empathy, and Pain

A common thread among these groups is a heightened sensitivity to pain—either their own or that of others—and a desire for this pain to be acknowledged by the world around them. This can lead to behaviors aimed at impressing their inner turmoil onto others, hoping to elicit understanding, sympathy, or even shared suffering. The externalization of their struggles serves both as a call for help and a strategy to validate their experiences. 

In doing so, they may inadvertently exert pressure on their relationships, seeking to provoke reactions that mirror their internal chaos. This dynamic can strain social bonds, as those around them are compelled to navigate the delicate balance between offering support and protecting their own emotional well-being.

How to Deal with Toxic Relationships with an Externalizer Personality

The impact of such externalization on interpersonal relationships is significant. For those on the receiving end, it can be challenging to maintain empathy and understanding when faced with the repeated pressure to absorb or react to another’s projected struggles. The key to navigating these relationships lies in recognizing the underlying pain and vulnerability that drives externalization while also establishing healthy boundaries to protect one’s emotional space. 

For the externalizers, the path forward involves developing greater self-awareness and learning healthier coping strategies that allow for internal processing of pain and conflict, rather than projecting it outward.

Understanding why certain groups are prone to externalization offers insights into the complexities of human behavior and the profound impact of our internal worlds on our external interactions. By fostering empathy and encouraging constructive approaches to personal growth and coping, it’s possible to create more supportive environments that acknowledge individual pain while promoting healthier, more balanced relationships.

Strategies for Growth and Harmony

In the intricate dance of human relationships and personal development, understanding and managing the tendency to externalize can be transformative. For those who find themselves often looking outward to explain their inner turmoil, and for those on the receiving end of such dynamics, there are pathways to healthier interactions and personal growth. 

The journey involves introspection, acceptance, and sometimes, the difficult task of setting boundaries. Here, we explore strategies for both the externalizers and those affected by them, aiming for a more balanced, understanding, and resilient approach to life’s challenges.

How to Deal with Toxic Relationships by Cultivating Self-Awareness

The path to overcoming the habit of externalization begins with self-awareness. This involves a gentle, introspective look at one’s behaviors and the motivations behind them. Recognizing the moments when you’re tempted to place blame externally is a crucial first step. This self-reflection should be undertaken without self-judgment, as the goal is understanding, not self-reproach. Through this process, individuals can begin to unravel the complex tapestry of their emotional landscape, identifying patterns that may have previously been obscured.

How to Deal with Toxic Relationships by Embracing Responsibility

A pivotal moment in the journey away from externalization is the embrace of personal responsibility. This step is about more than just acknowledging one’s role in various situations; it’s about recognizing the power and control we each have over our reactions and emotions. The realization that we can choose how we respond to external stimuli is both empowering and liberating. It marks a shift from a stance of perceived powerlessness to one of proactive engagement with our lives and challenges.

How to Deal with Toxic Relationships Through Seeking Support

The process of changing deeply ingrained habits can be daunting. For those who feel overwhelmed by the prospect of exploring their internal experiences and shifting their response patterns, professional support can be invaluable. Therapists and counselors can offer strategies to navigate emotional turbulence and foster resilience. They provide a supportive space to explore and understand the complexities of one’s internal world, offering guidance and tools for sustainable change.

Developing Understanding

For those on the receiving end of externalization behaviors, cultivating an understanding of these dynamics can be incredibly beneficial. Recognizing that externalization is a defense mechanism rather than a personal attack can change the nature of interactions. This understanding can reduce conflict and foster compassion, opening the door to more constructive communication and connection.

How to Deal with Toxic Relationships by Setting Boundaries

Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries is essential for protecting one’s emotional well-being. It’s crucial to identify and communicate your needs and limits clearly. Setting boundaries is an act of self-respect and self-care, not selfishness. It signals to others what is acceptable and what is not, paving the way for more respectful and mindful interactions.

Making Informed Decisions

In some situations, it may become clear that distancing oneself from relationships dominated by externalization is necessary for mental health and personal well-being. This decision should be made with careful consideration and, when possible, with the support of trusted friends, family, or professionals. Trusting your judgment and prioritizing your emotional health is paramount, even when it means making difficult choices.

Externalizer Personality and Grooming Others into Vulnerability

At the heart of the externalizer’s interactions with those around them is a deeply human need for connection, validation, and understanding. However, when this need manifests through grooming behaviors aimed at bringing others into a state of extreme vulnerability, it becomes essential to approach the topic with compassion, insight, and a deep sense of empathy. Recognizing these dynamics not only helps us understand the externalizer but also empowers those who find themselves on the receiving end of such behaviors.

The Drive Behind Grooming for Vulnerability

Externalizers, grappling with their own pain and unmet needs, may unconsciously seek to create environments where their experiences and emotions are mirrored by those around them. This grooming process, though often not malicious in intent, aims to deepen bonds through shared vulnerability. However, without awareness and care, it can lead to dynamics where boundaries are blurred, and emotional well-being is compromised.

Grooming behaviors may include constantly sharing one’s own struggles in a way that implicitly demands sympathy or action, pressuring others to divulge their insecurities or pain, or creating scenarios where the externalizer is positioned as the only source of support or understanding. These actions, while seeking to establish a connection, can place undue emotional strain on individuals, making them feel responsible for the externalizer’s emotional state.

Healing & Protection For All

As we reach the conclusion of our exploration into the dynamics of externalization and its impact, it’s crucial to approach both those who have been hurt by externalizer personalities and the externalizers themselves with profound empathy and hope. The journey through these interactions is often fraught with emotional challenges, but it also opens the door to deep healing and personal growth for everyone involved.

For Those Affected by Externalizer Personality

If you’ve been impacted by someone with a tendency to externalize, know that your feelings and experiences are valid. The confusion, exhaustion, and emotional strain you may feel in these relationships are understandable responses to being drawn into another’s unresolved emotional turmoil. It’s important to remember that your primary responsibility is to your own emotional well-being. 

This means allowing yourself space to heal, setting boundaries that protect your peace, and seeking support that reinforces your strength and resilience. Your journey is one of self-care and self-respect, recognizing that you are worthy of relationships that bring joy, mutual respect, and genuine connection.

Encouragement and Growth for the Externalizer Personality

For those who recognize externalizing tendencies within themselves, this moment of awareness is a powerful first step toward transformation. It takes courage to look inward and acknowledge the ways in which your actions may have impacted others. But in this acknowledgment lies the potential for profound change.

Seeking professional help is not an admission of defeat; rather, it’s a brave and hopeful step towards understanding and growth. Therapists and counselors can offer invaluable guidance as you work to uncover the roots of your externalization, learn healthier coping mechanisms, and begin to dissolve the projections and obsessions that have stood in the way of true connection.

The process of owning your experiences, emotions, and actions is not easy, but it is incredibly rewarding. It opens up a path to relationships based on authenticity, mutual respect, and deep understanding. By committing to this journey, you’re not just preventing harm to others; you’re also opening yourself up to the kind of personal growth that leads to genuine happiness and fulfilling connections.

A Path of Empathy and Healing

To everyone navigating the complexities of relationships influenced by externalization, remember that change is possible, and healing is within reach. For those who’ve been hurt, embracing your worth and prioritizing your emotional health can transform your life’s narrative. For the externalizers, embracing the journey toward self-awareness and change can radically improve your relationships and your sense of self.

This path is not always easy, but it is rich with potential for healing, growth, and transformation. Together, by fostering understanding, patience, and compassion, we can build a more empathetic and connected world—one where everyone is seen, heard, and valued.

Last Updated; September 18, 2025

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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The Alchemy of Surrender: A Journey to Liberation and Divine Joy

The Alchemy of Surrender: A Journey to Liberation and Divine Joy

In the dance of life, where each step can sometimes feel like a misstep, there’s a profound, often overlooked magic in letting go. Imagine life as a river—its currents swift, its direction ever-changing. Many of us spend our days paddling against the flow, muscles tensed, hearts racing, believing that control is synonymous with success. Yet, it’s often in the surrender to life’s thrashes and tumults that we discover not just ease but grace.

Surrender doesn’t mean giving up; rather, it’s a willing release into the current of life, trusting that the water knows the way. When we ease our grip on the oars and let the river’s flow guide us, we find ourselves moving with life’s intricacies rather than against them. This shift doesn’t just lighten our load but illuminates our path with a clarity born of peace and acceptance. In this gentle flow, we find a more peaceful state of mind, buoyed by trust rather than burdened by resistance.

This act of letting go also opens our hearts to a divine grace, a compassionate embrace that has always been there, waiting for us to notice. It’s in this surrender that we become fully present, our senses sharpened not by the adrenaline of battle but by the quietude of being. Here, in the stillness that follows our release, we become attuned to life’s subtleties—the divine whispers, the soft tug of intuition guiding us towards our next right action.

Moreover, surrendering to the flow of life doesn’t just bring peace; it brings potential. With our defenses down and our hearts open, we’re better positioned to see the opportunities life offers—paths that might have been obscured by our struggles or dismissed by our doubts. These are the chances to grow, to love, to live more fully than we ever imagined possible.

In embracing life’s ebb and flow with acceptance, we align ourselves with the rhythm of the universe. It’s here, in the dance of surrender, that we discover not just the grace of God but the strength within us to face life’s challenges with a smile. For it’s in our willingness to be moved by life that we find ourselves moving in harmony with everything that is.

Surrender Is Powerful

Surrender isn’t a passive act; it’s a fiery transformation forged in the crucible of repeated tragedies and profound suffering. Through these trials, our ego and the illusions of our false identities are stripped bare, leaving us utterly vulnerable. In this vulnerability, we face the raw truth of existence: life is a turbulent sea of mystery, unpredictability, and impermanence.

Yet, within this tempest, the seeds of awakening are sown. As we surrender to the ebb and flow of life’s tides, we awaken to our true nature, our essence beyond the fleeting dramas of the ego. We become witnesses to the passing phenomena, standing in the boundless expanse of awareness and consciousness.

In this awakening, we find liberation. Detached from the shackles of ignorance, we are free to bask in the radiant blessings of unity, love, and peace. Joy and happiness flow through us effortlessly as we recognize the divine essence within each of us. This is the sacred alchemy of surrender—a journey of profound transformation that leads us home to ourselves.

In the tapestry of human existence, surrender is not merely an act of resignation; it is a profound alchemy that leads to liberation and divine joy. 

Rooted in the teachings of Advaita Vedanta, surrender is the crucible in which the ego and false identities are dissolved, paving the way for a profound awakening to our true nature. 

As we navigate the tumultuous waters of life’s tragedies and suffering, we embark on a journey of self-discovery, guided by the wisdom of enlightened masters who illuminate the path to inner peace and joy.

The Fires of Transformation

Enlightened masters throughout history have extolled the transformative power of surrender. As Ramana Maharshi famously declared, “Surrender is to give oneself up to the original cause of one’s being.” In the crucible of suffering, the ego is consumed, and false identities are laid bare. Through this fiery ordeal, we realize the impermanence and unpredictability of life, as echoed in the words of Nisargadatta Maharaj: “Life is a succession of moments. To live each one is to succeed.”

Awakening to True Nature

As the flames of suffering purify the soul, a profound awakening occurs. We transcend the limitations of the ego and recognize our true nature as eternal consciousness. Adi Shankaracharya, the great exponent of Advaita Vedanta, beautifully encapsulated this truth: “Brahman is the only Truth, the spatio-temporal world is an illusion.” In this awakened state, we witness the passing phenomena rooted in the boundless expanse of awareness.

Liberation and Divine Joy

Detached from the illusions of the ego, we experience liberation from ignorance and suffering. Swami Vivekananda eloquently expressed this liberation: “The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you.” Freed from fear and attachment, we bask in the radiant blessings of oneness, love, and peace. As the joy of divine nature floods our being, we revel in the playful dance of existence.

Embracing the Journey with Joy and Fun

While the path of surrender may seem daunting, it is also imbued with joy and playfulness. As Sri Sri Ravi Shankar reminds us, “Life is a combination of play and seriousness. One should know how to balance both.” Amid life’s challenges, we can find moments of laughter and lightness, knowing that each experience is a stepping stone on the journey to self-realization.

Ancient Teachings On Surrender

Surrender is a central theme in many ancient spiritual teachings, including Buddhism, Advaita Vedanta, and other philosophies. It’s often described as the act of letting go of the ego’s desires and the realization of a deeper, more profound connection with the universe, or the divine. Here’s how surrender is perceived and valued in these traditions, along with some quotes from enlightened masters:

Buddhism

In Buddhism, surrender is closely tied to the concept of non-attachment and the understanding of Anatta (no-self). Surrendering in this context means letting go of the illusion of control and the self-centered ego, leading to liberation from suffering (Dukkha).

“Let go of anger. Let go of pride. When you are bound by nothing, you go beyond sorrow.” – Buddha

Advaita Vedanta

Advaita Vedanta, a school of Hindu philosophy, teaches that the self (Atman) is identical to the ultimate reality (Brahman). Surrender here is the dissolution of the egoic sense of separation, realizing that all is one.

“Surrender is giving oneself up to the original cause of one’s being. Do not delude yourself by imagining such a source to be some God outside you. One’s source is within oneself. Give yourself up to it.” – Ramana Maharshi

Other Schools of Thought

Other spiritual traditions also highlight the importance of surrender, though the context and interpretations may vary. For example, in Christian mysticism, surrender to God’s will is a pathway to divine union and peace.

“Submit to love without thinking, as the sun rose this morning recklessly extinguishing our star-candle minds.” – Rumi

The Power of Surrender

Across these teachings, surrender is seen not as a defeat but as a powerful act of wisdom and courage. It is the acknowledgment that true control comes from relinquishing the need to control, leading to a state of peace, contentment, and a deeper understanding of the self and the universe.

“By letting go, it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try, the world is beyond winning.” – Lao Tzu

These quotes and teachings reflect a universal truth found across many spiritual paths: that in surrendering, we find freedom. Surrender allows us to move with life’s flow, embrace its unfolding, and open ourselves to deeper truths and the potential for enlightenment.

Finally

In the grand tapestry of existence, surrender is the thread that weaves together the fabric of liberation and divine joy. Guided by the wisdom of enlightened masters, we embark on a transformation journey, surrendering the ego and awakening to our true nature.

As we embrace life’s challenges with courage and joy, we unlock the boundless potential of our divine essence, radiating love, peace, and happiness to all beings. In the words of the ancient sages, “Surrender to the divine within, and you shall find the eternal joy that resides in the depths of your being.”

Btw, you will LOVE The Shankara Oracle. 

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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Grace: The Mystical Force That Transforms All Realms

Grace: The Mystical Force That Transforms All Realms

 

​​Grace: The Mystical Force That Transforms All Realms

Grace, that invisible thread connecting us to the Divine, is a power beyond words, a phenomenon beyond comprehension. It moves through the fabric of our lives, touching us in ways that defy logic. Grace is more than just a concept—it’s the force that infuses life itself with the purest, sweetest energy, transforming everything it touches. It is the ultimate expression of love, mercy, and divine intervention, altering hearts, minds, and matter in ways that ripple through time, space, and reality, changing outcomes for all beings in all realms.

Grace is unstoppable, inexhaustible, and infinite in its scope. It transcends our limited understanding of cause and effect, often appearing as what we call “miracles.” Yet, these miracles are not random acts of magic – they are the tangible effects of grace at work, the manifestation of divine will and compassion, seamlessly woven into the fabric of existence. When we begin to recognize and align ourselves with grace, we unlock a higher reality, where the impossible becomes not only possible but inevitable.

The Nature of Grace: A Divine Transmission

Grace is the imbuing of the purest energies into living and non-living beings, and into the very fabric of scenarios. Through grace, hearts soften, minds open, and matter itself is transformed. It is not bound by the constraints of time, nor is it limited by the laws of physics or human understanding. Grace has the power to alter circumstances in ways that seem miraculous, yet are completely natural in the context of the divine.

Adi Shankaracharya, one of the great sages of Advaita Vedanta, said, “By the grace of the Guru, the disciple’s mind becomes inward, and through the grace of the Self, the mind is fully realized.” This points to the understanding that grace is the divine light that reveals the true nature of reality—both the external and internal worlds. It is the gentle push, the guiding hand that leads us back to our own inherent divinity.

Grace, by its very nature, is unstoppable because it is infused with a boundless resolve, a force born from an ancient, immortal sea of co-created vulnerability. When living beings—both human and other-worldly – reveal their true nature and lovingly relinquish their illusions of separation, they open the doors for grace to flow freely. In that sacred surrender, grace fills the spaces between what is and what could be, transforming reality on infinite levels.

“God’s grace is like a wind that is always blowing. You have to raise your sail,” said the great sage Ramana Maharshi. This profound analogy invites us to understand that grace is always present, always available. We only need to open ourselves to it, to allow its winds to guide us toward our highest potential. To open ourselves to grace is to embrace vulnerability, to release control, and to trust in the divine flow that orchestrates all things.

Grace as the Source of Miracles

Miracles often seem like isolated incidents—divine interventions that defy the laws of nature. But in truth, they are simply the natural result of grace in motion. Grace bends the very fabric of time and space, changing outcomes, events, and circumstances in ways we cannot predict or explain. The healing of a terminal illness, the sudden alignment of impossible events, the transformation of a hardened heart – these are not anomalies but rather the hallmark of grace’s presence in our lives.

Mother Meera, an embodiment of divine grace herself, once said, “Grace is always there, but you have to ask for it.”There is a deep wisdom in this statement. Grace is an ever-present, ever-flowing force, but it requires our participation. It invites us to step out of our limited perception, to ask for its assistance, and to align ourselves with its power. Miracles are born in that alignment, when grace meets our open heart and willing spirit.

Through grace, specific, undeniable changes occur to details, events, beliefs, hearts, minds, and circumstances. These changes are not random, nor are they the result of mere wishful thinking. They are the direct result of grace—the divine force that orchestrates everything in perfect harmony. Grace reorders reality, dissolves obstacles, and opens pathways that were previously unimaginable. This is how miracles are born.

When we live in alignment with grace, we begin to see that life itself is a miracle. Every breath, every heartbeat, every moment of connection is infused with grace. “Grace is what makes the impossible possible, what gives us strength when we have none, and what brings light into the darkest corners of our lives,” said Amma, also known as Mata Amritanandamayi. Her words remind us that grace is not a distant, inaccessible force – it is the very substance of life itself.

Living a Life of Grace

So, how do we invite more grace into our lives? How do we live in such a way that we are constantly aligned with this miraculous force? The answer lies in surrender. Grace, by its very nature, requires us to let go of control, to release our tight grip on how we think things should be. It requires us to trust that there is a higher intelligence at work, one that knows far more than our limited minds can comprehend.

When we stop trying to control every aspect of our lives, when we let go of our need to be “right” or “perfect,” we create space for grace to enter. When we live in surrender, we allow grace to flow through us, transforming our hearts, minds, and circumstances in ways we could never have imagined.

Grace is how miracles are born. And you, my dear, are one of those miracles. Your very existence is a testament to the power of grace. So, stop complaining. Stop doubting. Stop living as though you are anything less than divine. Start living like the miracle that you are. Embrace grace, allow it to guide you, and watch as your life transforms in ways beyond your wildest dreams.

As Swami Vivekananda said, “The winds of grace are always blowing, but it is you that must raise your sails.” The divine is always waiting, always offering its love, its guidance, and its grace. All we need to do is open ourselves to it, to raise our sails, and to let grace carry us into the fullness of who we are meant to be.

Grace is not a distant force reserved for the holy or the enlightened – it is the very essence of life itself. It is in the air we breathe, in the light that warms our skin, in the love that fills our hearts. When we open ourselves to grace, we open ourselves to the infinite possibilities that life has to offer. And in that space, miracles are born.

So, live like the miracle you are. Let grace transform you, and watch as it transforms the world around you.

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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Fear and the Path to Liberation: A Spiritual Journey Beyond the Mind

Fear and the Path to Liberation: A Spiritual Journey Beyond the Mind

 

Fear and the Path to Liberation: A Spiritual Journey Beyond the Mind

By Paul Wagner (Krishna Kalesh)

In our journey through life, fear seems to find us wherever we go. It manifests as a fleeting moment of panic or as a constant undercurrent, subtly shaping our decisions, thoughts, and desires. But fear is not just an emotion – it’s a doorway, a sacred invitation to examine our attachments, our identity, and ultimately, our relationship with the divine.

To explore fear is to explore the very nature of our existence. In the teachings of Advaita Vedanta, the non-dual wisdom of the Upanishads, we are reminded that fear arises from the illusion of separateness. As long as we see ourselves as distinct from the world, from others, or from the divine, fear will remain. But what if we can move beyond this illusion? What if we can realize the truth that we are not separate, but one with all that is?

Fear as a Construct of the Mind

Adi Shankaracharya, one of the greatest proponents of Advaita Vedanta, reminds us: “Brahman is the only truth, the world is illusion, and the individual self is none other than Brahman.” When we understand this, we realize that fear, like all emotions, is a product of maya – the veil of illusion that clouds our perception of reality. Fear exists only because we identify with the limited, transient aspects of ourselves: our bodies, our minds, our roles. But these are not who we truly are.

In the Pali Canon, the Buddha speaks of fear in the same context of ignorance and attachment. He teaches that fear arises when we cling to what is impermanent. “All conditioned phenomena are impermanent,” the Buddha reminds us in the Dhammapada. When we grasp onto what is fleeting – be it relationships, material possessions, or even our own ideas of self – we inevitably invite fear into our hearts.

Both Advaita Vedanta and Buddhism point to the same ultimate truth: fear is not real. It is a construct of the mind, born out of our misunderstanding of reality. When we identify with the eternal Self, the Atman – which is one with Brahman – we transcend fear. Similarly, when we follow the Buddha’s path and see through the illusion of permanence, we liberate ourselves from the grasp of fear.

Near-Death Experiences: The Edge of Fear and Liberation

Near-death experiences provide a unique lens through which we can explore fear. When faced with the possibility of death, we are stripped of our illusions. What matters in those moments is not our possessions, our social status, or even our accomplishments. What emerges is the raw experience of being – of consciousness itself.

Amma, Mata Amritanandamayi Devi, often speaks about the nature of fear in the context of death. She says, “We should see death as a wake-up call to live more fully, more lovingly. It is only when we confront death that we can truly understand the preciousness of life.” Near-death experiences, then, are not just encounters with fear – they are opportunities for profound spiritual awakening. They show us that fear is rooted in our attachment to the body and the ego, but when we release these attachments, we discover the boundless freedom of the Self.

Mother Meera, another great spiritual teacher, echoes this sentiment. She teaches that fear of death and fear of loss stem from our forgetfulness of the divine. “You are always connected to God,” she says, “No matter what happens, that connection can never be broken.” This is the essence of Advaita – there is no separation between the individual and the divine. When we truly realize this, fear dissolves, and we enter a state of divine flow, where everything is seen as an expression of the One.

Embracing Fear: A Practice of Liberation

So, how do we live with fear in a way that leads us to liberation? Both Advaita Vedanta and the teachings of the Buddha offer practical guidance.

In Advaita, the practice is one of jnana yoga – the path of knowledge. We ask ourselves the fundamental question: “Who am I?” This question, posed by Ramana Maharshi and other great sages, is a gateway to understanding the illusory nature of fear. When we realize that we are not the body, not the mind, not our thoughts or emotions, we transcend fear. We come to see that the essence of who we are is pure consciousness – eternal, unchanging, and beyond the reach of fear.

The Buddha offers a similar teaching in the Anattalakkhana Sutta, where he explains that none of the five aggregates – form, sensation, perception, mental formations, and consciousness – are truly “self.” Fear, he teaches, comes from our identification with these impermanent aggregates. But when we see through their impermanence, we realize that there is no self to be harmed, no self to fear for. This insight leads to the deep peace of nirvana – a state of complete freedom from fear and suffering.

The Sedona Method: A Modern Practice of Letting Go

In the modern world, we often seek practical ways to engage with these ancient teachings. One of the simplest and most effective tools I’ve found is The Sedona Method, a practice that invites us to let go of our emotional attachments, including fear. When we encounter fear, instead of resisting or suppressing it, we allow it to be present. We welcome it with compassion and curiosity, and then we ask, “Can I let this go?” The answer is often yes, because fear is only as real as we allow it to be.

By releasing fear in this way, we create space for the true Self to emerge – the expansive, limitless Self that is beyond all fear. This practice aligns beautifully with both the teachings of Advaita Vedanta and the Buddha’s instructions on non-attachment. When we let go of fear, we are not just releasing an emotion; we are releasing the false sense of self that fear is attached to.

Fear and the Infinite Goodness Within

As we move beyond fear, we enter into a state of greater expansion. We begin to experience the infinite love and goodness that reside within us, the essence of our true nature. Adi Shankaracharya said, “You are the limitless ocean of consciousness in which all experiences appear and disappear. Realize this, and be free.” When we touch this truth, we realize that fear cannot hold us back from goodness, because goodness is not something we do – it is something we are.

Fear often tells us that we are not enough, that we must do more, be more, achieve more. But this is just another illusion. The true path to goodness is not through action alone, but through being. When we rest in the awareness of our divine nature, we naturally radiate love and light to others. We don’t have to force it, because it flows effortlessly from the depths of our being.

Amma once said, “Love is our true essence. It is the purest expression of the soul, and it is fear that blocks us from experiencing this love fully.” When we release fear, we open ourselves to the fullness of love that is already within us. This love, this innate goodness, touches the lives of others not through effort, but through presence. It reminds them of their own divine nature, their own capacity for love and light.

Conclusion: Beyond Fear, Into Liberation

Fear is a powerful force, but it is not the enemy. It is a guide – a teacher that points us toward the parts of ourselves that need healing, that are calling for expansion. When we embrace fear with compassion and wisdom, we allow it to lead us to deeper truths about who we are. We see that fear is a creation of the mind, rooted in the illusion of separation. But beyond that illusion lies the boundless truth of our oneness with the divine.

In the end, fear is not here to limit us. It is here to invite us into a greater experience of life, to push us beyond the boundaries of the ego and into the infinite expanse of consciousness. As we journey through fear, we find that it was never an obstacle, but a doorway – an invitation to remember our true nature and live in the freedom of that truth.

Let fear come, let it teach you, and when you’re ready, let it go. What remains is the vast, unshakable peace of the Self, the eternal presence of love, and the infinite possibility of the divine.

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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Divine Feminine Meaning – Goddess Energy and How to Embrace Feminine Energy

Diving Feminine Meaning: Goddess Energy and How to Embrace Feminine Energy 

In the hazy, aggressive Masculine at the core of the chaos in the world today, we find whispers of the sometimes forgotten attributes of The Feminine. She is within all of us, eager, proactive, nourishing, beautiful, and intense—and far more pervasive than we might realize.

In the verdant fields of existence, there blooms a flower, a symbol so profound, so vibrant,  it captures the very essence of the Feminine spirit. This flower is our purer nature and we might allow for her to speak to us more often.

With its expansive petals reaching towards the heavens and its roots firmly grounded in the nurturing Earth, this flower of The Feminine serves as a cosmic beacon within us, illuminating the intricate dance between the Feminine and Masculine energies that weave the tapestry of our desires, projections, relationships, and reality.

At first glance, the flower’s lush, radiant form invites us to delve into the nature of Feminine—intuitive, nurturing, and boundlessly creative. It is a testament to the inherent strength in softness, the power in receptivity, and the wisdom in understanding. Its petals, arrayed in myriad colors, whisper of the multifaceted nature of existence, where each hue resonates with a unique frequency, yet harmonizes within the spectrum of life.

Divine Feminine Meaning: The Fiery Heart of the Feminine

One is drawn to the fiery red at the flower’s heart, a symbol of passion, desire, and the untamed force that drives creation. This fiery core, surrounded by the gentle embrace of the petals, embodies the dynamic interplay of Feminine and masculine principles. With its depth of emotion and connection to the mysterious forces of life, The Feminine merges with the Masculine’s fiery drive and focused intention, birthing new realities in their sacred union.

This divine merger is not a conquest but a dance, a co-creation where each energy honors the other, blending in a spiraling embrace that gives rise to the world as we know it. In its majestic beauty, this merging serves as a mirror, reflecting the balance and harmony that arises when the Feminine and Masculine come together in mutual respect and love.

Within this cosmic dance, the  Feminine does not merely complement the Masculine but stands as its equal partner (though often more dominant and profound, in fact). Yet, each enhances the other’s strengths and mitigates their weaknesses. Together, they create a dynamic equilibrium, a pulsating rhythm that sustains the universe. Like the flower that draws both sun and rain to flourish, reality is continually woven from the interplay of light and shadow, action and reflection, giving and receiving.

This dance, in its profound elegance, invites us to contemplate the essence of our being and the nature of our reality. It beckons us to embrace our own inner femininity and masculinity, to find the balance within that reflects the harmony without. In its silent wisdom, the flower teaches us that the dance of creation is ongoing, that each moment is an opportunity to co-create with the cosmos, and that within our hearts lies the power to shape our world with love, intention, and joy.

In this playful, cosmic exchange, we find the path to true creation, where every petal and every hue tells a story of love, harmony, and infinite possibility.

Divine Feminine Meaning in Ancient Teachings on the Interplay of Energies

As we delve deeper into the vibrant tapestry of existence, the interplay between the Masculine and Feminine forces reveals itself as the foundational dynamic of the universe. This dance, both ancient and eternal, is a theme that resounds through the corridors of time, echoing in the ethos of ancient civilizations and the wisdom of sages long past. It is within the sacred texts of the Greeks, the rituals of ancient pagans, and the whispered secrets of sages that we find Feminine revered as the primary divine force, a wellspring of creation and consciousness.

Goddess Energy and the Feminine in Ancient Greek Philosophy

In ancient Greece, the concept of the Feminine divine was personified in goddesses such as Gaia, the primordial Earth Mother, who was seen as the very embodiment of the Earth and its fertility. This reverence reflects a deep understanding of the Feminine as the source of all life, a nurturing force that sustains and regenerates the cosmos. Philosophers like Plato recognized the importance of the Feminine principle, especially in his theory of Forms, where the material world, associated with the Feminine, interacts with the ideal, Masculine forms, to give birth to all of existence.

Goddess Energy in Pagan Celebrations of the Feminine

Ancient pagan traditions, with their deep-rooted connection to the natural world, celebrated the Feminine as the embodiment of nature, fertility, and the cycle of life and death. The Wheel of the Year, marking the changing seasons, symbolizes the endless cycle of growth, decay, and rebirth, overseen by the Goddess in her many aspects. These traditions understood the Feminine as the matrix of creation, where all life begins and to which it returns, underscoring the cyclical nature of existence and the role of Feminine in the continuity of life.

Divine Feminine Meaning in the Wisdom of Ancient Sages

The ancient sages, across various cultures, recognized the primacy of Feminine force in the universe. The Tao Te Ching, for example, speaks of the Tao as a great mother, an empty vessel that nurtures and gives form to all things without claiming ownership or dominion. This mirrors the concept of Shakti in Hindu philosophy, the all-pervading, creative power that is both the cause and effect of the universe, manifesting through the dynamic interplay with Shiva, the consciousness or masculine principle.

For many sages, the divine feminine meaning was not just symbolic but practical, guiding how people lived and related to each other. Recognizing the divine feminine meaning in their words shows how timeless this wisdom remains.

How to Embrace Feminine Energy in Balance with the Masculine

This interaction between the Masculine and Feminine is not a hierarchy but a harmonious balance where each aspect complements and enhances the other. The Masculine principle, with its qualities of logic, order, and action, finds its expression through the fertile ground of the Feminine’s intuition, creativity, and receptivity. Ancient teachings suggest that the universe itself was born from this sacred union, a cosmic dance that continues to animate the world.

In these ancient traditions, the Feminine is revered not only as a source of life but as the very fabric of consciousness itself. The feminine abounds throughout the cosmos, a primary divine force that shapes the material and spiritual worlds. It is the wellspring of wisdom, the keeper of mysteries, and the guardian of the cycles of life.

Through this lens, the Iris flower, in its profound beauty and complexity, emerges as a symbol of the divine feminine. Its layers of petals, intricate and vibrant, invite us to explore the depths of our own being, to recognize the Feminine within us all, and to honor its role in the creation of reality. As we look to the ancient wisdom of the Greeks, pagans, and sages, we are reminded that the balance of masculine and feminine energies is essential for harmony, growth, and the continual unfolding of the universe. 

In acknowledging the primacy of the Feminine, we align ourselves with the ancient currents of knowledge and the eternal dance of creation, stepping into a world where every moment is an act of co-creation, guided by the timeless interplay of light and love, action, and receptivity, spirit, and matter.

Divine Feminine Meaning vs. Modern Feminism and New Age

Today’s conversations around feminism and the broader cultural phenomenon often described as “new-ageism” have, in some circles, veered away from their roots in empowerment, healing, and deep, transformative change. 

Instead, there’s a noticeable shift towards a dialogue that, while aiming to address genuine grievances, sometimes ends up mired in pettiness and accusatory tones. This shift has sparked debate about the essence of feminism and spiritual growth, drawing attention to the importance of returning to principles that genuinely uplift and heal.

How to Embrace Feminine Energy and the Power of Feminism

Historically, feminism arose as a courageous movement aimed at challenging systemic inequalities and advocating for the rights and dignity of women and, by extension, all of humanity. It was, and fundamentally remains, a call to acknowledge and embrace the power of the feminine—understood not just as gender but as a principle embodying qualities like empathy, nurturing, and interconnectedness.

This movement has been instrumental in driving profound societal changes, empowering individuals, and initiating healing dialogues.

However, critiques have emerged that some aspects of contemporary feminism have strayed from these empowering and healing origins. The focus, as some argue, has shifted towards an engagement that is more reactive than proactive, more about pointing fingers than extending hands. This critique suggests a need for a return to a feminism that harnesses the true power of the feminine: one that embodies courage, fosters deep healing, and promotes a sense of unity and understanding beyond the surface level of grievances.

Goddess Energy and the Critique of Modern New Age Spirituality

Similarly, new-age spirituality, which once promised a departure from dogmatic religiosity towards a more inclusive, heart-centered spiritual exploration, faces its critiques. Observers note a tendency towards superficiality and escapism, with some practices emphasizing personal gain over collective enlightenment.

The critique posits that modern new-ageism, for all its talk of love and light, often skirts the harder truths of shadow work, the necessity of facing and integrating one’s fears, and the deep, sometimes painful work of genuine spiritual growth.

This version of new-ageism, described as “toxic” by its critics, is seen as all projection and fear, lacking the authentic heart and transformative power it seeks to embody. It underscores a departure from the profound potential of spiritual practices to facilitate personal and collective healing, growth, and enlightenment.

How to Embrace Feminine Energy for Authentic Empowerment

The critique of both modern feminism and new-ageism underscores a yearning for movements that are truly rooted in empowerment, healing, and depth. It’s a call to remember the foundational principles that these movements and ideologies were built upon: principles of courage, compassion, deep healing, and the transformative power of genuinely embracing the feminine—and by extension, the human—spirit in its fullness.

This dialogue invites a reflective return to authenticity, urging individuals and communities to engage in practices, conversations, and movements that truly honor the depth, complexity, and healing potential of the feminine. It’s a reminder that at the heart of feminism and spiritual growth lies the potential for profound healing, unity, and transformation, far beyond the limitations of pettiness and accusation.

Divine Feminine Meaning and the Pervasiveness of Feminine Energy

Enlightened masters, such as Mata Amritanandamayi Devi, affectionately known as Amma, often speak of reality and the divine essence as fundamentally feminine in nature. Through their teachings, they illuminate the nurturing, creative, and omnipresent qualities of the divine, attributing to it characteristics that are traditionally associated with the Feminine principle. 

Amma herself, with her endless acts of compassion and embodiment of unconditional love, serves as a living testament to the maternal, all-embracing nature of God. In her embrace, devotees find solace, healing, and a palpable sense of divine love, reinforcing the concept of the universe as a nurturing, maternal presence.

Amma’s teachings delve into the idea that the essence of God, or the supreme consciousness, transcends gender yet encompasses the qualities of both masculinity and femininity, with a pronounced emphasis on the latter. This perspective resonates with the ancient belief systems that view creation, sustenance, and transformation as aspects of the divine feminine. 

According to these teachings, the universe is not just a passive arena for divine play but an active, nurturing force that supports all life. It’s a view that highlights the interconnectedness of all beings and the underlying unity of existence, with the Feminine principle acting as the cohesive force that binds the fabric of reality.

The reverence for the Feminine divine, as elucidated by Amma and echoed in various spiritual traditions, speaks to a universal understanding of the Feminine as not just a part of the divine but as a primary force of creation and consciousness. With its attributes of compassion, empathy, wisdom, and nurturing, this principle is seen as the guiding light of existence, the underlying current that sustains life and fosters spiritual growth.

Divine Feminine Meaning: Summary on Goddess Energy, Power, and Beauty

The discussions around the Feminine divine, enriched by the insights of enlightened masters like Amma, reveal a profound reverence for the Feminine as a symbol of creation, beauty, and spiritual wisdom. From the lush petals of an Iris symbolizing the depth and complexity of the Feminine spirit, to the ancient teachings that honor the Earth as a Mother and to the enlightened beings who embody divine love, the message is clear: Feminine principle is a powerful, nurturing, and creative force that underpins reality.

This understanding encourages us to recognize femininity as an aspect of the divine and a fundamental expression of the cosmos. It invites us to see the world and the divine with new eyes, appreciating the beauty, strength, and wisdom inherent in the Feminine. As we embrace this perspective, we open ourselves to the possibilities of growth, transformation, and unity, guided by the eternal dance of Masculine and feminine within us and around us. 

Ultimately, understanding the divine feminine meaning helps us see beauty and power as inseparable. By honoring goddess energy and practicing daily how to embrace feminine energy, we live more fully aligned with both ancient wisdom and modern truth.

As you ponder the immensity of The Feminine within you, enjoy The Shankara Oracle.

 

Last Updated: September 18, 2025

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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Spiritual Hospice: New Age Spirituality and the Dangers of Toxic Spirituality

The concept of spiritual hospice describes how seekers can become trapped in comforting illusions. While new age spirituality often promises freedom, it can sometimes lead to toxic spirituality when truth is replaced by ego boosts.

In the age of social media and instant gratification, the realm of spirituality has undergone a transformation. What appears on the surface to be a journey toward enlightenment and Self-realization can devolve into a misleading and Self-indulgent escapade filled with mere crumbs from the ancient teachings rather than a truly nourishing meal.

“Education and information are growing, but knowledge and discrimination are decreasing.” — Amma

In the contemporary spiritual landscape, numerous influencers purvey quasi-spiritual wisdom and half-baked ideologies, presenting these offerings as divinely inspired. They tout their experience, often described in vague terms such as “for quite some time” or “for many, many years,” as a badge of expertise. Yet, one might question the depth and authenticity of their trendy, hyperbole-ridden resumes.

Many of these individuals appear to sidestep rigorous spiritual training and discipline, perhaps deterred by the demands of genuine scholarly pursuit or a genuine understanding of spiritual practices. Instead, they opt for a path that requires less effort and more self-aggrandizement. 

This approach, possibly born out of a lack of guidance and an aversion to disciplined study, leads them to propagate their beliefs, drawing others into a cycle of superficial adherence rather than deep understanding.

This modern phenomenon, which might be termed “Spiritual Consumerism,” mirrors the impulses of a society inclined towards instant gratification and easy answers. 

This unchecked circus can be seen as a “Spiritual Hospice,” where the allure of new-age ideologies and their charismatic leaders offers a false comfort of spiritual awakening and enlightenment. This seductive narrative, however, often bypasses the rich, complex tapestry of ancient wisdom, leaving seekers at a standstill, bereft of the opportunity for true spiritual advancement.

The irony of this movement lies in its underlying motives – far from the selfless dissemination of wisdom, it frequently serves the dual purposes of ego reinforcement and social validation for the influencer, at the expense of genuine spiritual growth for the follower. This creates a cycle where superficial engagement is celebrated, and deeper, more meaningful exploration is neglected, leading to a spiritual malaise masked as enlightenment.

In this context, the karma of such endeavors becomes evident, not as a contribution to the collective spiritual journey, but as a self-serving endeavor that capitalizes on the earnest search for meaning by many, offering not nourishment but rather a mirage of spiritual fulfillment.

Spiritual Hospice is very much what it sounds like: A misdirecting, medicating, intoxicating, and numbing process created to ease or remove a person’s understanding of the pain of their life, relationships, and reality, rather than encouraging them to dive deeper within your Self, inquire about it, fathom it all, and then embrace it all.

Spiritual Hospice is when the soul gives up on liberation and seeks the comforts of illusion through things that simply appear to be spiritually illuminating but are not. This path enables the soul to seek further comfort and then more comfort, thereby keeping her in endless cycles of suffering and separation from the path of self-realization.

The ego can obfuscate any aspect or reality, even our divine nature – until we awaken to the non-truth, illuminate into God’s love, and choose to expand into our liberated Self.

We must choose to embody I AM I WILL, I AM I WILL to break the egoistic and confusing chains that limit and imprison us.

You almost can’t blame the influencers and phonies out there – because most of them are hopped up on the cocaine of Spiritual Hospice as well. They’re only teaching what they have come to learn (without much effort). Oh, I masturbated in a post about an alien orb of light, and people liked it! I must be a spiritual leader! No, you’re just a liar selling spiritual porn.

Truth be told, brainwashers were long ago brainwashed themselves.

Each time someone is hooked on Spiritual Hospice, they inch deeper and deeper into the stage of arrogant denial. They begin to defend the candy they’ve been consuming for years, further embedding themselves in the mud of false identities and spiritual delusion.

As someone deeply immersed in the wisdom of The Dharma and the teachings of ancient sages, I feel compelled to share my perspective on the current landscape of spirituality today. 

Having spent 34 years exploring and teaching in this space, I believe that true spiritual evolution and liberation are rooted in timeless wisdom and practices that transcend the ego and illusions. 

This perspective informs my assertion about the pitfalls of what I term “spiritual candy,” the food we’re fed amid a global pandemic of a Spiritual Hospice.

A little candy now and again is fine, but, my heavens, it’s truly out of hand now.

The Allure of Spiritual Hospice in New Age Spirituality

Narcissistic new-age spiritual influencers flood social media platforms with colorful and captivating content. Their posts, often adorned with affirmations, spiritual buzzwords, and idyllic images, lure followers into a realm of apparent spiritual comfort, denying them the depth of teachings that could set them free.

These influencers promise an easy path to enlightenment, where Self-love, positivity, manifestation, and material wealth are just a click away. It’s an alluring mirage that beckons an oddly devoted crew who claim they seek solace, spiritual growth, and meaning in their lives. This form of new age spirituality often feels safe, but the comfort is part of the trap that defines spiritual hospice.

We might even say, “But I’ve been doing this for a long time. I’m a teacher and healer, so what I do must be correct.” And there you have it – the perfect embodiment of complete delusion.

Toxic Spirituality and the Dangers of Misdirection

Underneath the facade of spiritual comfort lives a potent force of misdirection. The emphasis on superficial aesthetics, material abundance, unbridled creativity, and Self-centered spirituality can distract followers from the real work of Self-discovery and Self-realization. 

True spiritual growth requires introspection, facing one’s shadow Self, dissolving projections into the past and future, extinguishing attachment, and embracing discomfort and uncertainty. 

Spiritual hospice, however, encourages followers to avoid these essential steps – as if some miraculous process involving looking in the mirror and saying how pretty we are will purify our karma and liberate us. It won’t.

New Age Spirituality, Spiritual Candy, and Ego Boosts

Spiritual hospice serves a steady diet of “spiritual candy” to its followers. These are nuggets of wisdom and encouragement that feel good in the moment but lack the substance required for genuine growth. 

Followers are bombarded with messages that boost their egos, telling them they are already enlightened and perfect just as they are. While this may provide temporary comfort, it hinders the deeper journey toward Self-awareness, and more importantly, Self-reliance – the REAL foundation of Spiritual Warriorship.

Meanwhile, some of these spiritual aspirants read a post based in ancient teachings, and they are so triggered by it, that they can barely communicate. Instead, they blame the teaching. They can barely fathom looking at how they were triggered by their own addiction to the nonsense they’ve been consuming.

How Spiritual Hospice Prevents True Spiritual Evolution

The most insidious aspect of Spiritual Hospice is preventing true spiritual evolution. Followers become complacent, basking in the glow of their supposed spiritual prowess and possible superiority. 

They may mistake spiritual materialism for genuine growth, collecting crystals, attending workshops, and amassing followers while missing the essential inner work required for Self-realization. A pretty rock will only get you so far, which isn’t very far at all.

Unlike the weeks or months leading up to our physical deaths, we can die in this world to our egos, minds, and illusions without any spiritual candy. In fact, where traditional hospice helps people transition to the next place, Spiritual Hospice blocks every door, removing the ability for a seeker to choose a path to her liberation.

Avoiding Toxic Spirituality and the Trap of Spiritual Hospice

To avoid falling into the trap of Spiritual Hospice and embark on a genuine path of Self-realization, individuals can take several key steps, which include Sadhana.

Sadhana is a Sanskrit term commonly used in Hinduism, Buddhism, and other Indian spiritual traditions. It refers to a dedicated and disciplined spiritual practice or regimen undertaken by individuals to achieve spiritual growth, self-realization, or enlightenment. Sadhana encompasses a wide range of spiritual activities and practices, and its specific nature may vary depending on the tradition, teacher, or individual practitioner. 

Question Everything External: Be critical of influencers and content that promise quick fixes and superficial spirituality. Authentic spiritual growth is a lifelong journey that requires effort, introspection, and discomfort.

Embrace the Shadow: True Self-realization involves facing one’s shadow Self—the parts of us that we often hide or deny. It involves Self-inquiry into the nature of the I Am, the I, and the Me. 

Self-inquiry involves introspection and questioning the nature of the self. It is a method for gaining Self-awareness and transcending egoic attachments.

Embrace discomfort, confront your fears and insecurities, and be open to personal growth through challenges, discomfort, and the release of old emotions. Over time, if we are earnest in our efforts, we begin to free ourselves slowly.

Seek The Ancient Teachings: Focus on the ancient sages’ purest teachings and follow the enlightened spiritual gurus’ lineages. Avatars like Amma (Amma.org), Mother Meera, Anandamayi Ma, Paramahansa Yogananda, and Ramana Maharshi to name a few.

Practice Meditation: Regular meditation practice can help you stay grounded and connected to your inner Self. It fosters Self-awareness, emotional release, and genuine spiritual growth.

Prayer: Prayer can take various forms, including reciting specific mantras, prayers, or affirmations. It is a way to express devotion, seek guidance, or cultivate a deeper spiritual connection.

Yoga: Yoga asana practice, which involves physical postures and breath control, is a common element of sadhana. Yoga helps to balance the body and mind and prepares the practitioner for deeper meditation.

Chanting: Chanting sacred sounds, mantras, or hymns is a means of invoking spiritual energies, focusing the mind, and creating a meditative atmosphere.

Study of Scriptures: Many practitioners engage in the study of spiritual texts, scriptures, or teachings of enlightened masters as part of their sadhana. This intellectual aspect helps deepen one’s understanding of spiritual principles.

Fasting and Austerity: Some sadhanas may include periods of fasting, dietary restrictions, or other forms of physical austerity to purify the body and mind.

Selfless Service and Compassion: Engaging in selfless service (seva) and acts of compassion can be a crucial part of sadhana, as it helps to cultivate humility, empathy, and a sense of interconnectedness with all beings.

Pilgrimage: Undertaking spiritual journeys to sacred places or temples is a form of sadhana practiced by many devotees.

Sadhana is a way to transcend the limitations of the ego, gain self-realization, and attain a deeper understanding of one’s spiritual nature. The consistency and sincerity with which sadhana is undertaken are key factors in its effectiveness.

Beyond New Age Spirituality: The Essence of True Growth

The path to genuine spiritual evolution and Self-realization is not complicated, as it has been illuminated by sages throughout time. It involves practices deeply grounded in The Dharma and the ancient teachings that have guided seekers for centuries. These practices are not mere coping mechanisms but transformative modalities that lead us toward liberation.

The essence of these practices includes meditation, the release of emotions, dispelling illusions, cleansing desires before taking action, engaging in honest Self-inquiry, detachment from what doesn’t serve the pure Self, prayer, chanting, and a commitment to Sadhana (spiritual practices).

To truly evolve, we must discern what is best to consume. Discrimination around our rampant consumption of content determines our spiritual health.

Toxic Spirituality and Modern Influencers

Many spiritual influencers today offer content that may provide momentary comfort but often lacks ancient teachings’ depth and transformative power. If a spiritual practice does not transcend the small Self, ego, and mind, it becomes more of an ego or personality activity than a true spiritual endeavor.

While teachings like those attributed to The Shankara Oracle can be valuable tools to help seekers organize themselves toward healing and liberation, it’s essential to remember that they are meaningful only when aligned with the ancient teachings and a commitment to Sadhana.

New Age Spirituality: Tarot, Oracle Cards, and Coping Mechanisms

Today’s trend of tarot and oracle card readings, often focused on ego, identity, and social connections, may serve as coping mechanisms or comfort food. Still, they can lead individuals in circles rather than toward genuine spiritual evolution. 

If these tools do not open the door to ancient practices and a deep Self-inquiry that eradicates ego and illusions, they risk perpetuating the cycle of suffering.

Spiritual Hospice vs. the True Metaphysical Process

A genuine metaphysical process transcends the small Self, ego, and mind. It takes us beyond our triggers, preferences, and attitudes, guiding us toward Self-realization and soul freedom. Suppose we engage in practices that do not lead us beyond our temporary Self-identities and ego-driven comfort. In that case, we risk reinforcing our illusions and projections, ultimately leading to suffering.

You are far more expanded and capable than you realize. Your bridge from this mundane world to becoming truly liberated is not far from you. Doing the deeper work will awaken you to your path toward Self-realization.

Awakening Beyond Spiritual Hospice and Toxic Spirituality

In a world where Spiritual Hospice seeks to lull us into complacency, it’s crucial to remain vigilant and committed to genuine Self-realization. Avoid the allure of narcissistic new-ageism that offers false comfort and superficiality. 

Instead, embrace the challenging but deeply rewarding journey toward authentic spiritual growth. True awakening and self-realization can be found in this journey, characterized by introspection, Self-awareness, and genuine connections.

Conclusion: Spiritual Hospice, New Age Spirituality, and the Path Forward

My dear friend, I offer these insights as a Dharma teacher, a devotee of the ancient teachings, and my guru Amma. It is not a critique of what you find valuable on your unique journey. We each have our own path to undertake, and only we can discern what resonates with our souls and how we can best serve others.

My teachings and courses are meant to inspire you to delve deeper into the path toward Self-realization. Whether or not you teach, lead, or create in a way that aligns with your journey, I encourage you to explore practices that take you beyond the ego, mind, and illusions. 

You can expand to your most desired degree: Release triggers, embrace genuine Self-inquiry, and expand yourSelf into the transformative realm of ancient wisdom. Your unique path, rooted in the principles of The Dharma, can lead you toward profound Self-realization and, ultimately, liberation.

Ultimately, spiritual hospice warns us of stagnation disguised as healing. By seeing through the illusions of new age spirituality and resisting toxic spirituality, seekers can return to a path of true evolution.

 

Last Updated: September 18. 2025

 

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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The Complex Identity Of Being Born Again

The Complex Landscape of Being Born Again 

Faith is a profound and deeply personal journey for millions of people around the world. Among these seekers, born-again Christians have emerged as a vibrant community with a strong emphasis on following Jesus’ teachings. 

While there are undoubtedly positive aspects to their faith, it is essential to acknowledge the complexities that arise when rigid beliefs intersect with notions of exclusivity, judgment, and divisiveness.

If we’re honest, we know that Born-Again Christians tend to believe in a heaven that’s more difficult to enter than the wealthiest golf club.

Alignment With The Born Again Concept

The Christian concept of being “born again” fundamentally refers to a spiritual rebirth, moving away from an old way of life toward a new life in faith and understanding. While the terminology and religious context might differ, the essence of transformation, renewal, and awakening is also present in Hinduism and Buddhism. Here’s how these concepts resonate across these traditions:

In Hinduism

Hinduism, with its rich tapestry of philosophical explorations, presents the concept of spiritual rebirth through several lenses:

Reincarnation and Karma: At a fundamental level, Hinduism teaches the cycle of birth, death, and rebirth (samsara), driven by karma. This endless cycle can be transcended through spiritual awakening and realization, leading to moksha, or liberation from the cycle of reincarnation. This liberation is akin to being “born again” into a state of eternal bliss and unity with Brahman (the ultimate reality).

Self-Realization and Enlightenment: Hinduism places a strong emphasis on self-realization, the profound understanding of one’s true nature beyond the egoic self. This is often described in texts such as the Upanishads. Achieving self-realization is akin to a spiritual rebirth, as it represents awakening to one’s true, divine nature, which is a state of pure consciousness or Atman, ultimately realizing its unity with Brahman.

In Buddhism

Buddhism, founded by Siddhartha Gautama (the Buddha), emphasizes the idea of spiritual rebirth through the concepts of enlightenment and Nirvana:

Enlightenment (Bodhi): Buddhism teaches that through the practice of the Eightfold Path, individuals can achieve enlightenment, a profound awakening that offers insight into the true nature of reality, the impermanence of the world, and the causes of suffering. This awakening is a form of spiritual rebirth, moving the individual from ignorance to insight, from darkness to light.

Nirvana: The ultimate goal in Buddhism is achieving Nirvana, a state of liberation and freedom from the cycle of birth, death, and rebirth (samsara). Reaching Nirvana is the ultimate spiritual rebirth, characterized by the extinguishing of desire, aversion, and delusion, leading to peace, liberation, and a profound understanding of reality as it is.

Common Ground

In both Hinduism and Buddhism, as in Christianity, the transformation is not merely an intellectual shift but a profound change in one’s being and essence. It involves a moving away from a life led by ignorance, sin, or suffering toward a life marked by wisdom, purity, and spiritual enlightenment.

While the paths and practices toward this spiritual rebirth might differ, the core idea resonates across these traditions: a profound transformation that leads to liberation, enlightenment, and a deeper connection with the divine or ultimate reality. 

This rebirth is marked by an inner awakening that fundamentally changes how one perceives themselves and the world around them, embodying a new way of being that is in harmony with spiritual truths.

The Positive Aspects of Born-Again Christianity

Emphasis on Transformation: Born-again Christians place a significant emphasis on personal transformation and spiritual rebirth. The concept of being “born again” resonates with the universal desire for inner growth and renewal found in many spiritual traditions.

Love and Compassion: Jesus’ teachings on love and compassion are central to the faith of born-again Christians. These principles are in harmony with the core teachings of Buddhism and the emphasis on love found in various spiritual texts, including the Vedas.

Seeking Meaning and Purpose: Born-again Christians, like many others, are on a quest for meaning and purpose in life. This shared human aspiration transcends religious boundaries and connects individuals on a spiritual level.

The Poison of Arrogance and Exclusivity

Rigidity and Exclusivity: One of the major challenges in some born-again communities is an unwavering belief in their religious exclusivity. This can lead to intolerance and the assertion that their faith is the only valid path to salvation. Such rigidity can alienate those who follow different, even older, and more profound spiritual traditions.

Judgmental Attitudes: While born-again Christians are encouraged to live by the teachings of Jesus, many individuals within this community adopt judgmental attitudes towards those who do not conform to their beliefs. This judgment can be divisive and contrary to the spirit of compassion and acceptance found within the teachings of Jesus.

If you’ve ever been judged by a Christian, forgive them. They have NO idea what they’re doing. Most likely, the person judging you is at the beginning of their spiritual quest.

Hatred and Intolerance: In many cases, born-again Christianity has been associated with expressions of hatred and intolerance, including racism and discrimination. These attitudes run counter to the values of love and inclusivity taught by Jesus.

Moving Towards Harmony

Interfaith Dialogue: Engaging in respectful interfaith dialogue can help bridge the gaps between different religious communities. Recognizing common values and shared aspirations fosters understanding and harmony.

Self-Reflection: Born-again Christians, like all individuals on a spiritual journey, can benefit from self-reflection. Examining one’s beliefs and attitudes to ensure they align with the teachings of love and compassion can lead to personal growth.

Promoting Inclusivity: Encouraging inclusivity within faith communities and promoting acceptance of diverse beliefs can help counteract the poison of exclusivity and judgment.

Born-again Christians, like adherents of other faiths, navigate a complex terrain of beliefs, values, and behaviors. While there are undoubtedly positive aspects to their faith, it is crucial to acknowledge and address the negative tendencies that can arise, including arrogance, racism, judgmental attitudes, and exclusivity.

Harmony and understanding can be achieved when individuals of all faiths recognize the shared values that underpin their spiritual journeys. Embracing love, compassion, and inclusivity while addressing divisive attitudes can pave the way for a more tolerant and spiritually enriching world, where all seekers can coexist and learn from each other’s unique paths.

The Fruits Of Christianity

Like many other religions, Christianity has a rich tapestry of beliefs and values that often go unseen or overshadowed by some individuals’ negative attitudes and actions. 

Here are some of the most wonderful aspects of Christianity that may be overlooked:

Message of Love and Compassion: The message of love and compassion is at the core of Christianity, as exemplified by Jesus Christ. His teachings emphasize caring for the marginalized, showing kindness to others, and practicing forgiveness. These principles can inspire profound acts of love and service.

Community and Support: Many Christian communities provide their members a strong sense of belonging and support. Churches often serve as places of solace, guidance, and fellowship, where people can find spiritual nourishment and a sense of community.

Charitable Work: Christianity has a long history of charitable work, from running hospitals and schools to providing humanitarian aid worldwide. Christian organizations and individuals often engage in acts of kindness and generosity to alleviate suffering and promote social justice.

Focus on Redemption and Forgiveness: The concept of redemption and forgiveness is central to Christianity. It offers the hope of transformation and second chances, emphasizing the potential for personal growth and healing.

Art, Music, and Culture: Christian art, music, and culture have contributed immensely to human civilization. Christian themes have inspired iconic works of art, cathedrals, and timeless music compositions and have enriched global culture.

Philosophical and Ethical Reflection: Christian theologians and philosophers have engaged in deep philosophical and ethical reflection. Their writings have influenced moral and ethical discussions that extend beyond the boundaries of Christianity.

Promotion of Peace and Nonviolence: Many Christians advocate for peace and nonviolence, following the example of Jesus, who preached turning the other cheek and loving one’s enemies. This commitment to peace has inspired movements for social justice and reconciliation.

Resilience and Perseverance: Throughout history, Christians have shown remarkable resilience and perseverance in the face of adversity. Their faith has often given them strength to overcome challenges and hardships.

Spiritual Depth and Exploration: Christianity offers a rich tradition of spiritual depth and exploration. Contemplative practices, such as Christian meditation and prayer, provide avenues for individuals to connect with the divine and explore their inner spiritual lives.

Interfaith Dialogue: Many Christians engage in interfaith dialogue and cooperation with people of other religions. This fosters mutual understanding, respect, and cooperation, contributing to greater harmony among diverse religious communities.

It is important to recognize that the negative attitudes and warped beliefs of some individuals do not represent the entirety of the Christian faith. Like any religion, Christianity is a diverse and complex tradition with a wide range of interpretations and expressions. These wonderful aspects of Christianity reflect the values and teachings that continue to inspire many Christians to live lives of love, compassion, and service to others.

Your Awakening

To learn deeply and to be steadfast and focused on transformation, we must clear ourselves of egoistic, trendy, consensus-driven, and incorrect information conjured by sensationalistic influencers, religious fanatics, and those who are born-again within their faith-based communities.

The Vedas and Buddha have outlined the technology of enlightenment for thousands of years, which extends far beyond the limits and judgments of Christianity.

To transcend the limits of your religion, focus on Sadhana (spiritual practices), and be devotional toward God, enlightened masters, and their teachings. This is the path to your rebirth. You are the only one who can do it. 

A wonderful place to start is The Shankara Oracle.

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do

What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do

Life is an unpredictable journey, and there are moments when we find ourselves standing at a crossroads, uncertain about which path to take. You might be facing difficult challenges and feel overwhelmed. You might be deeply unhappy and have no idea how to change it. 

Grappling with uncertainty is a common human experience, and it is okay not to have all the answers. Learning how to navigate periods of uncertainty is part of our journey.  Here is a guide to help you navigate challenging times of uncertainty:

Meditate

No matter how challenging the circumstances, try to find time to meditate every day. The more challenging the circumstances, the more important it is to find the time and space to meditate. When we allow our minds to take over, we can exacerbate negative states, and fail to see opportunities and possibilities. 

Meditation promotes relaxation and reduces stress. In a world filled with constant stimulation and information overload, meditation provides a much-needed pause. It calms the mind, lowers cortisol levels, and induces a state of inner peace. 

As you let go of your thoughts and find more inner peace, you can also create space for inspiration and divine grace. You won’t be able to access your inner wisdom or receive guidance from your spirit team if you don’t quiet your mind. 

Allow your emotions

When we suppress emotions we cannot see clearly. Find a practice that helps you connect to your emotions and release them. You can journal, go in nature, pray or do a ritual. Allowing your tears, fears and anger to express, you can finally release them. Each challenge is an opportunity to heal and renew. 

Depending on the situation, you might want to work with a therapist, intuitive reader, coach or other healer, to help you understand yourself. If you clear the inner debris, you can find the next step that serves you well. 

Pray 

Prayer is very powerful. Seek help and guidance by praying to your guru, deity or to the Divine as you might be referring to Her in your spiritual practice. You can also invoke the help of your guides, angels and ancestors. 

Perform spiritual rituals

When we head out in nature to connect with The Divine through rituals, we remember our origin and the power within us to change our lives. With the most loving and earnest intentions, you can shift, release, and transcend all that troubles you. Be devotional through rituals of letting-go and worship.

Evaluate your life objectively

It is important to take stock honestly so you can navigate your circumstances and be prepared. You may not know what to do next, but taking stock helps you understand what areas of your life need some improvement and attention. Evaluating your situation objectively might also show you that in fact you have nothing to worry about. 

Practice self care

Relaxation is a pathway to divine wisdom. Make time for spiritual practices, eat nourishing food, go for walks in nature, and explore activities that you enjoy. You can add helpful modalities such as acupuncture, and use herbs that help support your inner wellbeing. 

Seek guidance & support 

Getting advice can often unlock a lot of doors and relieve a lot of burdens. Sometimes we can remain stuck because we don’t have the right perspective or the right piece of information. As you meditate and reflect on your situation, consider what kind of help you need. While it may seem like a lot sometimes to invest in support, you may not be aware of the cost of not doing so. 

Surrender & Trust

You might be carrying burdens that are not yours to carry. You might be deeply attached to specific outcomes or desires. Lay it all down at the feet of the Divine and trust. You will still need to participate and take action, but you can do so without attachment. 

You can simply sincerely ask the Divine to take your burdens. You can do this in any way that feels good and nourishing to you. You can ask your spirit team, your guru, your deity or the Eternal Consciousness. The key is to do it genuinely from the heart. You can practice every day.

Uncertainty is difficult because we all tend to be deeply attached to specific outcomes and desires. If we are committed to evolving and growing spiritually, times of uncertainty can help us grow our spiritual inner strength, peacefulness and heal to the core. As you go within, release difficult emotions and mental obsessions, you can find your way to the next step that is right for you. 

Remember, Dear Soul!

In all things, you are unlimited, born from miracles – and you have great potential in every direction. Pray often, be devotional to your deity, guru, or The Divine – and over time, you will free your Self and merge with the brightest light in The Universe.

This is why I created The Shankara Oracle – to direct you to your deepest Self and help you find your way forward in every situation.

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.

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Shadow Work Meaning, How to Do Shadow Work and Shadow Work Meditation

This guide explores shadow work, it’s meaning, and how to do shadow work through journaling, therapy, and reflection, and offers tools like shadow work meditation for integration.

Shadow work is essential to healing and growing as a beautiful, loving, and spiritual person.  Diving deeply within your Self is the way to heal and illuminate all that binds and restricts you. 

Shadow Work Meaning: What Is Shadow Work?

Shadow work is a concept that has been popularized by various spiritual and psychological traditions, including Jungian psychology, and it involves the process of exploring and integrating the hidden or suppressed aspects of one’s psyche. 

These are the aspects that limit your Self-love and the ability to love others.

These hidden aspects, often referred to as the “shadow,” typically consist of repressed emotions, traumas, fears, and desires that you may not be fully aware of or may be reluctant to acknowledge. 

Shadow work aims to bring these aspects into conscious awareness, so you can work through them to achieve personal growth, healing, and Self-realization. Most importantly, shadow work helps you bring darkness into the light, which is good for All Beings Throughout All The Realms. As you dive into these aspects and learn how to heal them, you can release difficult self-oppressive patterns that might have been part of your journey for lifetimes. 

How to Do Shadow Work: Practices and Tools

Exploring the shadow work meaning allows us to reclaim parts of ourselves we’ve rejected. Practices such as journaling, role-play, and especially shadow work meditation help bring these unconscious patterns into the light.

Here are some general steps involved in shadow work, which can be adapted to different spiritual or self-help traditions:

Self-awareness: Begin by examining your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Pay attention to patterns that seem to repeat in your life or areas where you feel stuck or challenged. Allow emotions to rise up within you and give them as much space as they need. Over time, you can learn to release them by simply asking yourself – can I release this now? Okay, when?

Active forgiveness: Consciously and relentlessly working on forgiving someone can have profound effects in your life. Release what you can, forgive everything, and over time, you’ll have the space within you to embody the most divine attributes.

Journaling: Writing in a journal can be a powerful tool for exploring your inner world. Write down your thoughts and feelings, and be honest with yourself about your fears, insecurities, and past experiences.

Meditation: Practicing meditation can help you observe and release your thoughts and emotions without judgment,  reaction or impact. This can make it easier to uncover hidden aspects of your Self, so that you can eventually free the ones that restrict you and illuminate the ones that can bring you to Self-realization.

Seek spiritual guidance and study the ancient teachings: Work with a spiritual teacher who specializes in shadow work that leads to illumination and deep healing. Study the ancient teachings and you will find your mind and heart begin to relax, settle, and embrace the divine light within you.

Inner dialogue: Engage in an inner dialogue with the different parts of your Self, including the aspects you consider to be your shadow. Ask questions, listen to their responses, and try to understand their underlying motivations. In all things, speak highly of your Self and love you Self. No one is coming to save you – you must save your Self.

Acceptance and integration: The ultimate goal of shadow work is to accept and integrate the hidden aspects of your psyche. This involves acknowledging that these aspects are a part of you and finding healthier ways to express and manage them. When we truly own every aspect of our lives, including all experiences, we become Self-reliant, and eventually awakened and illuminated to our divine Self.

Engaging in shadow work while being devotional to your deity, The Divine, and your guru. Engage Sadhana (spiritual practices) to enhance your spiritual growth. 

Shadow Work and Integration

Many people ask ‘how to do shadow work without being overwhelmed?’ The process can feel uncomfortable, but understanding the shadow work meaning and practicing with care makes it transformative.”

Set a clear intention: Begin your shadow work with a clear intention. State your purpose for exploring your shadow self, such as seeking personal growth, healing, or a deeper connection with The Divine, your deity, and guru. This intention will guide your efforts and keep your spiritual focus intact.

Invoking The Divine Consciousness: Before starting your shadow work sessions, invoke the presence of your chosen deity through prayer or meditation. Ask for their guidance, support, and protection during your journey into the shadow self. This can help you feel spiritually connected and secure.

Align with your values: Ensure that your shadow work aligns with your spiritual values and principles. This means approaching it with humility, compassion, and a genuine desire for self-improvement. Avoid using shadow work as a means to indulge in negative behaviors or self-criticism. 

Incorporate shadow work into your sadhana: Integrate elements of shadow work into your existing sadhana. For example, you can include reflective journaling or introspection as part of your daily practice. This allows you to explore your inner world within the context of your spirituality.

Seek guidance from your deity: During your sadhana or meditation, communicate with your deity and seek their wisdom and guidance on your shadow work. Ask for insights, clarity, and the strength to confront and heal the hidden aspects of yourself.

Self-compassion: Remember that shadow work can be challenging, and you may uncover difficult emotions or past wounds. Be gentle with yourself and practice self-compassion. Your deity, if part of your belief system, is likely to encourage self-acceptance and forgiveness.

Rituals and offerings: Incorporate rituals or offerings to your deity as part of your shadow work process. These can serve as a way to honor your spiritual connection and seek blessings for your inner exploration. You can also use rituals as a way to release difficult aspects and set intentions for more positive aspects to enter your life.

Consistency: Make shadow work a consistent part of your spiritual journey. Dedicate time regularly to delve into your shadow self and work on integrating it with your conscious self. Over time, this practice can lead to deeper spiritual insights and growth.

Seek support and guidance: It can be beneficial or necessary to work with a spiritual mentor, therapist, or guide who understands both shadow work and your specific spiritual path. They can provide valuable insights and support as you navigate this journey. 

Trust the process: Have faith that The Eternal Consciousness, your deity, guru, and The Divine are supporting your growth and Self-discovery. Trust that your shadow work is an essential part of your spiritual evolution and that it aligns with your devotion. 

Shadow Work Meaning and the Path to Wholeness

Ultimately, the shadow work meaning is about wholeness. By learning how to do shadow work and practicing shadow work meditation, we can integrate the hidden self and awaken to freedom.

Shadow work is essential to spiritual and personal growth. Without the willingness to look at these aspects, we cannot heal and move forward. Suppressed emotions, old traumas, unhealthy conditioning can keep us stuck for lifetimes. When we choose to heal these aspects within ourselves, we can finally liberate ourselves. 

By integrating shadow work with your devotion to the Divine, your guru or your deity by making it part of your sadhana, you can create a holistic approach to your spiritual growth that encompasses both light and shadow. This will ultimately lead you to greater self-awareness and a deeper connection with your spiritual path.

In all things, be deeply devoted to The Divine aspects of The Universe and your divine Self. Over time, you will naturally release all that binds you and see the pathway to your illumination, and eventually your enlightenment. 

The Shankara Oracle and Paul Wagner’s The Personality Cards are profound tools to help you uplift your shadow into the light. 

Last Updated: September 18, 2025

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About The Author:

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Paul is a spiritual healer and coach with more than 30 years of experience. He is the founder of The Shankara Experience, and creator of The Shankara Oracle and The Personality Cards.

His work is focused on guiding seekers to inner freedom and awakening.